How to Forgive Your Child Molester and Get Closer to God

Okay, we since we have been on the issue of grown people who have lived with unbearable memories of being molested by someone close to their family, someone in the family or even a stranger, we feel it is our responsibility to show you how to forgive whomever it was who molested you as a child or even if you are still a child. Here at AT2W, we just do not want to discuss physical, sexual abuse or even emotional abuse without showing you how to forgive the abuser and get closer to God.  Our staff is guided by the Holy Spirit to deal with ancient issues that have negatively effected the black church or any church as a whole.  We are also guided to show you how to deal with your pain and move on with your life and many times, it means you must learn how to forgive and get closer to Jesus Christ.  However, one thing is for sure, it does not mean an individual is bitter, because they are speaking out against these issues which has suppressed many women, men, girls and boys. We realize it is very difficult to open up about past situations in your life that may have badly destroyed your spirit.  So, we desire you to learn how to forgive your child molester (or any other abuser in your past) and get closer to our God. First, you must ask yourself, if you are willing to forgive your sexual abuser, it does not matter how long they may have molested you or how many times.  The question is, are you ready to forgive them? Think about it, many times in our lives God may have not blessed us, because who made the choice not to forgive those who trespassed against us and this includes a child molester who may have violated you.  Do not make this choice to forgive, just because you want God to bless you with materialistic values, but do it because you want Him to bless you with spiritual values, according to His will. If you are prepared to forgive, you must began praying for that person who sexually molested you.  No matter how hard it seems, began to cry out before the Lord and start praying for them and call their name out to the Lord.  Sometimes, our child molesters are dead and we are still hurt, because what they have done to us.  Pray and ask God to help you to forgive them, because they are gone on to their reward and God knows, if they did not make it right with God, they could be eternally lost in hell, so this is why it is very important for you to ask God to help you to forgive them.   It does not pay for you to carry this pain for the rest of your life. We just did an article on mothers who ignored their daughters who confessed they were molested by their mother’s best friends and how these grown women may have not had a good relationship with their mothers, because their mothers either did not believe them or just remained friends with their daughter’s child molesters, after acknowledging the fact it did happen.   Therefore, make up in your mind, if you desire to forgive your mother (and/or father), if she is guilty of this.   You must learn how to to pray, even if you do not feel you have the power to forgive your mother, pray and ask God to give you strength to forgive your mother.  It is very difficult if you have been brought up in the church and your mother is well respected and no one understands why you have distanced yourself from your mother, so even if no one understands, humbly bow down on your knees and ask God to give you strength to forgive your mother. Now, we realize sometimes this is hard to do, to pray and forgive your child molester or even your mother (or father) who did not take heed when you told them and either party did not ask you to forgive them, many times this could be the reason why people who have been molested cannot get their prayers answered by God, because they fail to realize they must forgive people, even when they do not ask for our forgiveness.   The Bible never said forgive based on whether or not a person ask you to forgive them, it just commanded us to forgive (Matthew 6:9-15, Matthew 18:21-35)Even if you feel you cannot do so, remember, pray and ask God to give you strength.  Remember, when you ask God to give you the power to forgive, he is listening to you, so realize God does exist. Start thanking God every day for your emotional healing and freedom.  Thank God He has delivered you from the bondage of unforgiveness.  Praise Him for giving you the strength to forgive those who did not even ask for your forgiveness, because this is what is going to give you power in your own life. Next, make a commitment each and every day to get close to God.  Pray and worship Him, ask him to cleanse you of anything that is not right in your heart. Although, you pray each and every day for your child molester and asking God to give you strength to forgive them and even your parent who ignored the situation while remaining their friend, you must learn how to move on with your life.  Avoid being around your child molester, even if it means separating from your mother or father until they realize how much the child molestation you endured in your past effected you.   This is one of the hardest part, because your parent may accuse you of not being a forgiving person, this is not true, tell them you must get closer to God and you feel their relationship with the person who has hurt you has distracted your closer walk with God, so you must move on with your life and only be around them when they are not around the individual.  Also, remind your mother or father, you may have difficulty forgetting about the past sexual abuse, if you cannot avoid being in their presence.  It does not matter if it was your family pastor, your parent’s friend or even a family member, you cannot remain in their presence and move on with your life, it is impossible.   Many times being in the presence of your abuser, makes it very hard to pray for them, especially, if they have denied molesting you.   Yes, honor your mother and father, but be honest, because if you are not honest, you live a lie and it is a sin to lie. God bless you, we hope this article has been a help to you.