A Toast 2 Wealth

Each and every married couple who is having difficulty saying those three simple meaningful words, “I love you,” to their spouse should take take this article very seriously.  When you made a commitment to spend the rest of your life with your spouse, it was a permanent vow, not a temporary one.  You see, many people think marriage most likely a temporary agreement on paper, they are in error and spiritually, they suffer for breaking matrimony, a mutual connection made in heaven, if both parties met in an accurate fashion without infidelity or adultery.

A lot of married couples got together the wrong way and expect to fix their marriage, but it does not work that way.  Make sure you did not offend anyone to get the man or woman you are with and no doubt, you will be able to heal your marriage.  One of the main solutions, is honesty, you must be honest with yourself before expecting your marriage to ever work, then the both of you can be honest with one another.

These 10 steps to making marriage work are for married couples who are on the brink of divorce. Your marriage can be saved, if you want it to be.

1. You must believe in prayer, so the both of you can pray together, three times a day. Even if you were single, praying three times a day is necessary when spending time with God.  Try to pray together, even if the both of you are at work, make a phone call and prayer with your spouse over the phone.  The both of you should pray at dawn (before you leave the house), noon and evening time (when the both of you arrive home).  King David prayed three times a day, but we all God-fearing believers should do so, because we need to constantly pray without ceasing (Thessalonians 5:17).  Many couples are in danger when they meet, because they do not believe in God.  The both of you must believe in God and obey His commandments.  If you met your spouse out of lust, prayer will not work, but if your mutual connection was out of love, God will not only hear your prayer, He will accept the both of you together.  Prayer is very important, because it is the only way to communicate with God, the creator of this universe.  A lot of people give up when they do not immediately get an answer from God, but that does not mean prayer does not work.  Prayer always works, but you and your spouse have to both have a close relationship with God.  God must always come first before anything in your lives, money, job, even your family.  God must know the both of you love Him, more than each other.
2. It helps to keep people out of your business. A lot of marriages suffer, because usually it is the wife who is not discreet.  It is a spiritual law to be discreet.  Did you know that? In the New Testament, it guides us wives to always be discreet, but if you notice the average hit love song, always talks about the man complaining about the wife who talks too much to her girlfriends and talks too much about their marriage.  It is never just a cute song, it is very true.  When wives (husbands) gossip they do a lot of harm to their marriage, because there is always a devious soul out to steal your spouse.  You have to be careful who you talk to and never talk to much.  Make it a habit to talk about other things, but you should keep very quiet regarding your marriage.   Even if your spouse makes a mistake and people know about it, it is none of anybody business to discuss his or her mistaken error.  Like you, your spouse is human and because you are one yoke, you have been designed to be the only one to understand him or her, no one else.
3. Remember the both of you are one yoke. You must learn to respect one another as you would desire to be respected.  One yoke means the two of your souls are as one.  You never treat your spouse with any less or more respect than you would yourself.  No one else is a part of your yoke.  No one else deserves your time, love or consideration, you would give to your spouse.  What God has joined together, let no one put asunder (Mark 10:9); therefore, you would not allow anyone to come between the both of you, because no one else should matter, not family, kids, friends or co-workers.  The only one who matters outside of your spouse, is God.  When you go out and do something special for your spouse, do not ever forget to include your spouse at all time.  For instance, after work you may have a taste for something sweet, do not just buy a pastry for yourself, take one home to your spouse and eat it together.
4. Every week make a plan to spend time away from your children, family and job. It would be a good idea to get away every weekend and let it just be the two of you.  There are many divorced couples who should have still been together, but because they did not take time just between the two of them, they are split for life.  Let this not be either of you, learn to make time, even if it is just going to spend time in a hotel suite in the same city where you reside, spend time together and make sure, you do not tell anyone.  Only the two of you should know where you are going to enjoy private moments together.  Remember?  The both of you are one yoke, no one else.
5. Every evening, the both of you should counsel one another.  If you have something you are unhappy about and you do not know how to admit it to your spouse, be honest, but pray first before each and every evening discussion.  The reason why it is important to always pray first, is because maybe you did something wrong and you are not sure if you should make a confession.  You have to be sure, if God feels it is the right time for your spouse to know, if you violated your marriage in anyway, because although you should not ever keep secrets, it is a time and place to confess all things.  There is danger with jumping ahead taking actions without cautiously evaluating if you should or should not first.  Although, you may not intend to offend your spouse, he or she may not be in the accurate state of mind to accept the truth of your confession, so be very careful.  When you have your private discussions, you can just simply talk about what may be hurting you outside the marriage, your annoyance does not necessarily have to be within the marriage.  You could just simply confess how much you love your spouse.  Whether your discussion is serious confessions or just simply about love between the two of you, as long as the two of you are spending a private moment together, every evening, it is all that matters.  The both of you need to talk and make it at least an hour.  Never skip a night and always make sure the two of you are making a tight bond.  If you argue, never go to bed that way, make sure you get close and apologize for any harsh words.
6. Get whatever is offending your spouse out of the way. Many times, married couples split up, because either spouse allows something or someone else outside of the marriage to offend your spouse.  You have the power to allow a stranger, friend, co-worker of family member to offend your spouse.  If the person always greets you and always ignores your spouse, you do not have to entertain it.  You see, a lot of times there is a lot of resentment in a marriage because a husband or wife is receiving attention that offends their spouse and it is not right.  A lot of spouse endure this for years and are not happy.  They deal with it, possibly because they do not have any place else to go or do not know how to cease the spouse.  Is this worth leaving your spouse for?  Yes, because neither you or your spouse should ever feel excluded or being mistreated to feel less than your spouse.  If someone else cannot respect your spouse, then, they do not ever deserve you to even greet them or notice their presence.  Your spouse is your spiritual connection, respect it.
7. Stay away from social functions that harm your marriage. It does not matter how normal it seems for married couples to go to clubs, it is not normal.  If you attend social events like going to a nightclub, you are putting your marriage at risk.  For years, many married couples made it a regular occasion to attend night clubs.  Why go to a place where there are a lot of lonely people, most times just seeking sex.  Married couples have no place in night clubs and it does not matter how many special nights are dedicated only for married couples, the people who regularly attend night clubs not only destroy marriages, but are out to destroy themselves.  Love can never be found in a night club and you should already have a strong love connection without going to such a place.
8. Be very limited when spending time around your family. People always think family is important, even after you get married, this is very untrue.  Your family is not important, because they are not longer your immediate family.  Your spouse becomes your family and then, if the both of you are happy around them, then make it only few times a month, if that much.  Family members can be a threat to a marriage, because a lot of times the meddle too much in business outside of their own lives.
9. Stay away from drugs and alcohol. If your marriage is driving you to drugs and alcohol, then the both of you need to pray and evaluate what the problem is.  As mentioned above, if you got together, the wrong way, possibly through infidelity or adultery, it is not going to work out anyway and if you get drunk a lot or use drugs, this is possibly the reason, neither of you have any business being together and you do not know how to deal with the truth.  If you feel you are in a legitimate marriage and you or or spouse have a problem with drinking booze or using drugs, then there maybe some deep issues within yourself or maybe some sort of unfaithfulness within your marriage.  Possibly, your spouse is having an affair and you do not know how to deal with, so all you do is get high.  The best thing you could do, is seek professional guidance, but do not continue to use alcohol or drugs.  It is not only bad for your health, but it is bad for your marriage, because many times, a person who is under the influence of alcohol or drugs may accidently harm themselves or the person close to them because of so much suppressed pain.
10. Make long term goals with your married partner. The fun of marriage is being able to share ideas of how the both of you may make your marriage more spicy in the future.  Even make a long term goal of making more money brings fun to a marriage, because you both could plan to start a business to help the both of you eventually stop working and spend time together.  Make plans of how you both can save money to invest in that lucrative business.  Then, the both of you could even plan how to eat better, make plans of how to stay in shape and keep one another away from foods that could eventually put either of you at health risk.

These 10 steps will help you and your spouse enjoy and life long marriage, but you have to be determined to realize that marriage is not just a piece of paper, it is an extremely important commitment, a vow the both of you made in permanent matrimony.  If the both of you are willing to commit to these 10 steps, you most likely will survive a long and happy marriage for life.

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